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New laptop is here, but since the most recent computerless phase coincided with the return of some of my favourite shows (Greek, I heart you!), I’ve been spending far more time catching up on the last few weeks in mindless entertainment, rather than paying attention to the increasingly depressing economic and political landscape and wistfully thinking about what could have been.

I have also been busy in updating my current machine, and protecting myself from being disconnected from all my news-updateyness in the case of another crash. I used to use a Firefox-based RSS feed program to keep me in the loop with my news and blogs, but what happens when the machine you’ve loaded the browser on goes belly up? You get totes screwed, that’s what happens. And so, I’ve finally jumped on the GoogleReader bandwagon, and have been busily loading RSS feeds from all over the ‘net. And I’m accepting suggestions for interesting new sites, iff’n you have ’em.

In a small bit of cosmic synchronicity, though, I finally checked back in to Things What Things (written by Linda/Miss Alli, formerly of TWOP, currently of NPR’s Monkey See) for the first time in a couple of months. only to see that she’d recently linked to the original That Guy post, the one that I’d read years and years and years ago and of which I was thinking of when I wrote my last post, but couldn’t find in my Google searches, and thus couldn’t link at the bottom of the post. (The post in question is now judiciously linked in my Delicious account, never to be lost again, natch.)

Sars: A close relative of Surely You Don’t Listen To The Corporate Schlock Masquerading As Pop Music These Days You’re Such A Sheep Of Convention Guy.

Alli: Who has no friends.

Sars: But is a close spiritual brother to Tolerate My Obscure and Painful Jazz Collection Guy.

Alli: Oh, and he hangs out at Whole Foods with the Four Horsemen of the Capitalist Apocalypse: I Can Taste The Tears Of The Downtrodden In Every Cup Of Starbucks Coffee Guy, Can’t Read Anything Purchased At A Non-Unionized Bookstore Guy, Guy With A Strange Preoccupation With Trash-Talking Pottery Barn, and Guy Who Thinks The Biggest Problem Facing Today’s Progressive Is Browser Compatibility.

Sars: He’s fighting the real enemy.

Alli: By cleaving to Netscape 4.7.

Sars: Yeah, That Guy. I Am An Endless Series Of Lectures On Organic Produce And The Pharmaceutical Cartel Guy. Also may manifest as What’s Funny About Hemp Clothing? Guy.

Alli: Exactly. And he has no idea that he is actually just as boring as his arch-nemesis, Just Let Me Take This Emergency Conference Call On My Cell Phone Headset While I’m Buying A Sesame Seed Bagel Guy.

Sars: Who is often confused with, but does not share entirely the same genetic coding as, I Incorporate Lines From Wall Street Into My Everyday Speech With No Irony Whatsoever Guy.

Alli: Who is, in turn, often mistaken for Can’t Order A Drink Without Consulting Esquire To See Whether Martinis Are Still Cool This Week Guy.

Sars: ARGH! I cannot abide that guy. And he’s always friends with No, He Likes You, He Just Doesn’t, Um, Talk Much Guy, who usually turns out to be Bitter, Jaded, Bad Poet Who Thinks “Kissing” Means “Drenching A Woman’s Jaw In Saliva” Guy.

Alli: And it’s not like he offers you a towel.

Sars: Of course not. And now, let’s all wave to Has No Sense Of Humor About Getting Salsa On His Pants Guy.

Alli: How can you have no sense of humor about that? It’s salsa! It’s your pants!

Sars: And yet he’s unamused.

Alli: That seems impossible.

Still hilarious.
Of course, as “Stumbles to Starbucks in Oversized Sunglasses and Yoga Pants Whilst Texting on her Pink Blackberry to Order a Grande Pumpkin Spice Latte Every Saturday Morning” Girl, “Prefers Cats to Relationships” Girl, and “Writes Angry Anti-Patriarchy Missives On Her Little-Read Blog” Girl, I’m really in no place to judge, am I? Knowing others is intelligence, knowing yourself is true wisdom, people. Who are you?

(Other recommended TWT? reading: What Girls Do, and for fellow caffeine-addicts, Random Notes. That cold-pressing coffee technique got me through iced-coffee season at a reasonable budget, through now I need to find a similar fix for the winter, as I don’t have a quick-milk-steaming solution. Yet. )


They love nothing better than sipping free-trade gourmet coffee, leafing through the Sunday New York Times, and listening to David Sedaris on NPR (ideally all at the same time). Apple products, indie music, food co-ops, and vintage T-shirts make them weak in the knees.

They believe they’re unique, yet somehow they’re all exactly the same, talking about how they “get” Sarah Silverman’s “subversive” comedy and Wes Anderson’s “droll” films. They’re also down with diversity and up on all the best microbrews, breakfast spots, foreign cinema, and authentic sushi. They’re organic, ironic, and do not own TVs. You know who they are: They’re white people. And they’re here, and you’re gonna have to deal.

From the Stuff White People Like book info, and srsly, ALMOST EVERY GUY I WENT TO SCHOOL WITH. And every single one of them would be so offended not to be considered a wholly original special snowflake. lol your Echo generation.

In other news, after a million and a half production and delivery snafus, a half dozen angry phone calls, and quite a few tears, my replacement computer is due to arrive this evening between the hours of 6pm-8pm. (Unless the delivery guy opts to take off in lieu of making the delivery to my apartment after I buzz him, AGAIN, ARGH.)