Fun Parenting? SACRILEGE!!!

OMG WON’T SOMEONE THINK OF THE CHILDREN?!?

For chrissake, I really hope this pearl-clutching-parental-fascism wave cools down by the time I procreate, because at this very moment in time? The thing turning me off the most is enforced proximity to the Stepford Mommies. I really don’t think giving birth inherently requires me to lose all sense of myself, or live a life of tedious, unrelenting piety forevermore.

(And, for what it’s worth, I think if these parties had been going on when I was a kid? My momma and I would have been on them like white on rice, cocktails/mocktails in hand, doin’ the twist.)

Happy International Women’s Day!

And just in time for Jill from Feministe to get stalked! For having opinions! While being female!

I’m just going to stew here in anger for a bit. But, for your thought-provoking reading pleasure on this grand and glorious day, I present the Male Privilege Checklist:

1. My odds of being hired for a job, when competing against female applicants, are probably skewed in my favor. The more prestigious the job, the larger the odds are skewed.
2. I can be confident that my co-workers won’t think I got my job because of my sex – even though that might be true.
3. If I am never promoted, it’s not because of my sex.
4. If I fail in my job or career, I can feel sure this won’t be seen as a black mark against my entire sex’s capabilities.
5. The odds of my encountering sexual harassment on the job are so low as to be negligible.
6. If I do the same task as a woman, and if the measurement is at all subjective, chances are people will think I did a better job.
7. If I’m a teen or adult, and if I can stay out of prison, my odds of being raped are so low as to be negligible.
8. I am not taught to fear walking alone after dark in average public spaces.
9. If I choose not to have children, my masculinity will not be called into question.
10. If I have children but do not provide primary care for them, my masculinity will not be called into question.